Constipation: Caused By Too Much Iran?

While waiting at stoplights and a car was going to turn, a friend of mine always had good advice for the person, “shit or get off the pot.”

I feel the same way about Iran. Two of our candidates are verbally constipated over the matter. Are they getting mocked for their lack of daily metamucil? No. The guy who says, “actually people, I’m not constipated. Maybe you should read up before that colonic.” He’s the one we are laughing at. Why? It makes sense.

Here’s another story. Once there were two guys going at it. Verbally. They kept telling one another how much they were going to hurt the other. One guy’s friend was holding the other guy back. My friend laughed at both of them. He calmly informed them that they were gay, but they didn’t know it yet. He went on to let them know that it was OK that they were gay, but they should really come out of the closet.

I feared for my friend’s life. He laughed again. “They weren’t going to fight,” he said. “If you wanna fight, you go up to someone and punch them in the face. No warning, no girly chit-chat. BAM! They won’t know what hit them.”

After that day, I never talked threatening to anyone again. I figured better to carry out the threat in advance. If you are not going to do that then back down BEFORE OPENING YOUR STUPID MOUTH.

Only Obama is doing this.

I don’t oppose the war with Iran. I don’t support the war. I know that I’m not allowed to have this opinion. Well, if you think that, screw you. I’m firm with resolve over my ambivalence. It’s not just iran. People are just so stupid because they don’t listen to any of my ideas, I’m pretty fed up with it all. In most cases we are basically arguing with Retarded Idea A vs. Retarded Idea B. Yawn.

If it were up to me, we’d call the politicians bluffs. War with Iran. Let’s do it now or otherwise, shut the fuck up about it all ready. I mean Hillary is a senator, she could sponsor a bill if she wanted war.

As the guvernator said, “Do it now!”


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